Why is it that getting a splinter in your thumb or slipping on the snow and making an enormous bump appear on the side of your hip—and an arse of yourself—is not so fun, yet watching a motorbike rider launch high in to the air and splitting his head open on the sharp edge of some wood is more fun than should be reasonably and legally possible? We’re talking about H.D. Trials on the Xbox 360, of course. Not real life! It’s the new rocking Xbox game that shouldn’t be allowed near anyone under the age of eighteen and is more violent than a shed full of maniacs waving about chain-saws.
And I love it. Not because of the blood, but because of the challenge; that and the fact that there are also a number of cool mini-games to play. Who designed these games I don’t know–but some of them make The Texas Chainsaw Massacre look like Fawlty Towers–
I also love it because I have the motorbiking skills of a simple child. But in H.D. Trials I can be a super-star! Within minutes of playing I was performing such awesome maneuvers as double backflips (to head smash) and frontflips (to head smash!).
Sorry, went off on a tangent there, now to what I was saying about the mini-games–
One such game involves, get ready for this–seeing how many bones you can break in one go. Yes! Just imagine that your worst enemy is seated precariously aboard the bike and it’s infinitely more fun! Here’s how it works: you set up at the top of a very large start ramp, gas it down and launch off a small kicker. Then you fly in to the air and try and contort the body in to a good position so that when you land you get smashed to a million pieces!
Got paid for that last freelance job that I did, you all know what that means, it’s about time to hit the shops and pick up that new pair of newton running shoes that I have been waiting to get. Steve, are you up for a little bit of shopping this weekend?
